On Changing your Mind

Yes. No. Maybe. I don’t know. People who change their mind a lot are often called indecisive, are branded as uncertain or that they “waffle.” These qualities are associated with a lack of confidence, or even worse, a lack of leadership. Political careers have been ruined because candidates have been branded as “flip-floppers”; business careers have been tainted because a CEO came in saying they were going to do things one way and ended up doing them another. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes this criticism is more than warranted. But the culture behind our reaction to someone changing his or her mind is dangerous.

By creating or continuing to perpetuate a culture that demands “consistency” and criticizes changing our minds, we risk people not only neglecting to be introspective and analytical about their choices, it also keeps people on the same wrong path because they are too afraid to admit that they have discovered that another path is better.

Why are we so fearful of the openness and curiosity it requires to cultivate a culture where changing one’s mind is acceptable? Why is this considered courageous instead of what is to be expected in a non-static world? Part of it is that we associate our decisions with our identity. In a way, this makes sense, as we have convictions and we feel a certain necessity to stick to them. But imagine if you still believed the same things about the world that you did when you were a kid. Why would anyone, when thinking rationally, believe that what they believed at the outset of learning something, or the first conclusion they made about something, would be the best and most accurate way to think about it? And yet we hold our beliefs to be unwaveringly true, and in the face of opposition, so many times, rather than considering the contrary, we only hold on tighter.

Admitting you were wrong, or changing your mind, is perhaps the strongest you could ever show yourself to be when it comes to leadership. To be able to say – I thought one thing. Then I learned something new. And now I think something different – shows that you are thoughtful, iterative, and understand complexities. As the world changes, shouldn’t we continue to grow and learn and change our mind as new information presents itself that there are better ways?

This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t make decisions, that everything should be thrown into disarray because people keep changing their mind all the time and can’t make a final decision. It just means, be open, be iterative, be curious, don’t be so sure of yourself, and admit when you’re wrong, and change.

 “That’s your responsibility as a person, as a human being — to constantly be updating your positions on as many things as possible. And if you don’t contradict yourself on a regular basis, then you’re not thinking.” – Malcolm Gladwell

Practice: Challenge yourself to look at all sides of a decision, even when you think for sure you know the right answer. Even if this is something that you’ve already decided upon a long time ago, revisit, and see if you still believe now what you believed then and if there is evidence to back up a better decision than the one you made. Allow and encourage others to do the same, and do not think of people as unreliable if they come to you and say that they have changed their mind.

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